loss

after a natural disaster- hurricane, tsunami, tornado- the to-do list consists of clear, concrete items to be checked off: assess the damage, clear the debris, rebuild. it can be an overwhelming list, but eventually most items will be crossed off the list.

after an unnatural disaster, such as a school shooting of any size, the lack of concrete needs can be unsettling, both to the families who are directly experiencing loss and to the people around them who are watching them experience this loss. these families aren't lacking in physical needs- food, clothing, shelter- but their aching need for the deceased family member to return is impossible for anyone to remedy. there are no benefit concerts or telethons to organize, just frozen lasagnas left on the doorstep and words that attempt to convey feelings about an event that never should have happened in the first place. there is no aid for this kind of rebuilding: the construction of The Rest Of Your Life.